...I LOVE the election!! Man!! Please let it last forever!!! It's so much fun to watch "journalists" dissect every minute detail of every sentence uttered or action taken by either of these two candidates ever in their entire lives. Did you see CNN today? Did you hear about how when John Kerry was a fetus, he was first going to be a girl, but then he just decided to get some Y chromosomes and become a boy? What a FLIP FLOPPER!! OMFG, DUDE! You certainly don't want a guy like that running the country.

In other election-related news, the nimrods over at conservatism are arguing over whether or not Jesus was a liberal. I sooooo want to post something like, "I don't know if he was a liberal, but he sure was GAY!"

In non-election related news, I offer the following statistics:
Average time required to purchase one 1/32 inch to 1/16 inch audio adapter: 34 seconds
Average time required to purchase same adapter from overly-ambitious Radio Shack salesperson with bushy sideburns who apparently gets a free boat or motorhome or something if he sells enough god damned batteries and cell phone plans: 4 hours, 31 minutes, 12 seconds.

No, dude. Seriously... I'm all set. Yeah... double A's, two. I'm good. No. Work pays for my cell phone. Really. My phone is free to me. I don't think you can offer a better deal than that. Yes, text messages too.

Thank you, goodnight.